By humility I felt a keen sense of how deep and dark that shadow was that I rested in. While other fans a bit closer stood up and fought for attention, I felt myself sinking deeper with an overwhelming sense of repression. It happens all the time in large crowds for me. It might have been a different story if I were in front of everyone. There's something different that happens there, like a separation or openness that just doesn't exist quite so much among the people. I have a coworker who claims to be convinced that I have a secret life as a performer.
I had a small dose of anxiety there, but that went as soon as it came and it was so minute that it didn't affect anything about the concert itself. After all, I went to enjoy the amazing talents of another...and that's just what I did.
I did have a birthday recently, and my work gives out the most random gifts for birthdays, but people have requested to see me try on mine, so I obliged them and took a picture. Most people got scepters, but they gave me a tiara.
And on to today. I was keeping busy at work when a co-worker popped her head into my office and said that someone brought something for me. I was so confused. I went out and found that someone was delivering this with my name on it:
The message on it said, "Bringing Back Your Smile" on it with a first name only. Strange thing is that I knew no one with that first name, but I work at a doctor's clinic and so it could have been some random meeting or contact that I don't recall. I'm still at this time wondering if they could have intended it for someone else (the instructions said it was for someone in Accounts Receivable, which is not my department); however, it had my name on it and there were no others in the building with my name, so no one else would take it.
It's all a shock to me because no one gives me flowers. That's another reason why I'm not completely convinced they belong to me. Getting two flower deliveries in two weeks is just throwing me through a loop. I'm not used to this.
That holder does make me smile, though. My grandparents had a set of yellow dishes with that exact smiley face on them. I used them all the time when I was a child.
