Part 12: Having to give someone negative feedback
The scary part of this isn't as much the message as it is worrying about how the person is going to handle it when he or she responds to it. I don't like to be the deliverer of bad news, and I've had a lot of positions when I had to deal with that feeling. It's the worst. When I know I have to bring it up, it's entirely possible I could have to step aside physically or mentally alone and have a personal one-on-one with myself to mentally prepare myself for any possible reactions I might get from delivering the unfortunate information and brace myself while I begin to deliver.
Negative feedback often receives the response of a negative reaction. While delivering it to the person, I try my hardest to explain so they understand why, because honestly I would like to know and understand the why behind negative feedback given to me. Sometimes they understand. Sometimes they don't. The hardest part of the situation is when the response turns to hurt or anger. The confrontation and accusation is a lot to bear, particularly when I'm only playing the part of the messenger and innocent of the things being said to me.
What makes this particularly difficult is the fact that I can understand those people, what they're feeling, how they're seeing things, and when they hurt, I hurt. It's not easy to look into someone's disappointed face and not feel it. The words they say to me out of their frustration or anger can haunt me for a long time.
Negativity and I don't mix well. I don't like negative moods and I don't like negative talk. The darkness behind it all is heavy and weighs on me. I've always been sensitive to it since I remember, and never was able to tolerate it. I don't speak out much, but when I do, be assured that I'd seen something in that particular situation/thing/saying that generates a degrading negative influence, and I want it to stop. Unfortunately, a lot of people are too set in their minds to listen, and that is sad to me, because I'm seeing them being influenced.
These situations definitely require a little processing time afterward to recover. I need to work through the emotions before I can pick myself up again and move forward.
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| The post left me feeling extra somber, so I went through my pictures with the thought in mind that I'd post the first one that made me laugh. Here it is! |
