Part 4: Job Interviews
This is the first specific put on the spot situation. Go to a job interview, and you're up front and center. No shadows to retreat to. No hiding place. That can be completely unnerving for someone not used to it. It's just me with a person who's not necessarily going to be sincerely friendly. There's always that element in that mind of theirs that's analyzing or evaluating everything about you. I don't know about others, but that makes me totally uncomfortable. It's as if the constant self-analyzing wasn't enough!
I don't like a constant flow of questions being thrown at me. It gets overwhelming, particularly if they are questions I'm not able to answer without thinking about it first. I might end up leaving those particular situations feeling sick, because I knew how much I wasn't able to articulate clearly. Generally speaking, I hate being loaded with questions, whether it's an official interview or casual conversation.
Last, but not least, one of the most uncomfortable thing about these situations is trying to convince the person I'm speaking with that I'm their best choice, basically presenting a pitch for myself. Writing on this blog as frequently as I do it may make some people think that I absolutely love to talk about myself. Not true. Writing has always been an outlet for me, but in real life I don't put myself out there much, even to a point that some people think I need to try harder to do so. I don't like trying to make myself look better than another person. I'm too aware of my own weaknesses to know that I'm not, and in that aspect I really struggle being pretentious.
It's highly possible that I also tend to underestimate the value of my skills, gifts, and talents, and in doing so struggle with promoting them. Bragging about them has never been my thing, and talking about those things a lot often feels like bragging to me. It's preferable to show instead of tell, and as a side note the more enthusiastic the response, the more likely I'll keep up the effort (and even do extra).
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| A bright and happy bouquet I ended up with once at work, though no one knew exactly who they were meant for. It was a daily reminder to look on the bright side despite the stressful situations I might have to deal with that day. |
