- Priority spending: Knowing the difference between wants and needs. I understood my family's financial situation at quite a young age, and learned to restrain myself, perhaps too well, not to give in to buying things that I wanted rather than needed. Purchase of all the extra things such as electronics, toys, extra new clothes, and many other items were always put on hold when the money was strained. Home, transportation, and food for the family were always the primary priorities.
- Being Frugal. I admit there are times when I go on a splurge, but that isn't a frequent habit. For the most part, I was raised to watch for the sales and clearance items before considering anything else. Most of the clothes there function the way I need them to, so it seems pointless to pay more for the same thing when that money could be saved for something more important.
- Being your own fashion. It always confused me why some people insist on wearing nothing but the fashionable brand names. They don't look any different from other clothes, so what's the big deal? Growing up on hand-me-downs and second hand store clothes, I was grateful for clothes that weren't worn down when I got them. I remember the first time I got a new dress that came from a store and how excited I was that it was all my own. I didn't worry about designer names. I was happy to have something brand new for once. But growing up not being able to afford those designer items, I learned my own clothing style was possible in any clothes. They didn't need a name, and they didn't need to change with the season fashions.
- Simple is sometimes better. There were perhaps a few classes and activities my mom wished she could afford to have us do. I'm sure she wished at times she could have put me in dance classes, because they somehow knew that whenever I had a room to myself I would most likely be dancing to some music. There were no formal classes, but if we were interested, we found a way to do the things anyway, even if it perhaps wasn't as polished as it would be had we been formally trained. There was enough money for us to learn at least the basics of piano and music, and I was fortunate enough to eventually become part of a community choir that was directed by a neighbor. In general though, we weren't thrown into activities to keep us busy, unless we wanted to do them ourselves, and with that the understanding was that we had to be responsible for whatever costs and supplies were required. Some of us (me) function a little better when we keep life's chaos to a minimum.
- Learning to entertain yourself. I have discussed this multiple times on previous posts. When you have little or nothing in your home or in your community to provide the entertainment, it is beneficial to the creative process. The fun games and activities we did while we were young will always be a fond part of our childhood, and often our neighborhood friends would join in also. Entertainment doesn't require money and an expensive night out.
- Celebrations don't need to be a big production. As I mentioned above, we didn't give gifts on birthdays, and I accepted that at a young age. Instead of presents, we chose what we wanted to eat for our birthday dinner, and we were free from having to take care of our disabled brother for the day. As for other holidays, no gifts on any holiday except for Christmas, and there were some years that those gifts came from a thrift store, but that didn't destroy the fun. The key ingredient of all of these celebrations was that the family was together. Nothing else mattered as much as that.
- Learning to work together and be productive. Perhaps productivity ended up meaning different things for different individuals, but it was learned nonetheless. Cooking meals was always teamwork. It was never one person being solely responsible with getting it done. Everyone had an assignment. It was the same with chores and even with working in the garden. I remember one summer being assigned to weed the backyard with the siblings who were still at home and feeling overwhelmed because the yard was full of them. We were clearing it out so we could put sod down. With the help of the others I was pleasantly surprised how quickly we got the weeding done, and it was the most satisfying feeling when we finally finished.
- Gratitude. I was one of those kids who grew up happy with what I had and didn't insist on getting more. I don't know how much I need to expand on this, except to say that I have been thankful for so many things, because of what I grew up learning.
- Understanding other people who are in the same boat. There are some people who look down on others, because of their poorly appearance, but that doesn't bother me quite so much, because I've had a taste of that. I've learned a long time ago that it's the person who is important, not his/her smell or looks.
- Having savings. This was an important one that my parents instilled in us, and perhaps it was also encouraged by some of the grandparents also, because it was my grandma who insisted that my parents set up a savings account for me when I wasn't even ten years old yet. I was always encouraged to set aside some money for savings every time I got a payment, and to refrain from actively taking money out, so that some would be there for an emergency.
That's my quick list of valuable things I've learned. I'm quite sure there are other things that I've learned from growing up this way, but they didn't come up in for this particular item. Perhaps if there is something else I will bring it up later on another post. This is sufficient for now though.
