"Believe in what your heart is saying
Hear the melody that's playing
There's no time to waste
There's so much to celebrate
Believe in what you feel inside
And give your dreams the wings to fly
You have everything you need
If you just believe"
The moment of enlightenment is brief, but a beautiful moment! As I sat there, I was reminded of something for some reason I always have to be reminded of: I posses a beautiful gift that valuable and needed more these days than ever. It pertains the my ability to feel emotions deeply, but specifically the one known as love. This isn't physical love being spoken of, it's the mere fact that I have a genuine interest in people, but this moment it was realized that in order to really show genuinely that particular love, there were some personal issues I needed to let go of, particularly forgiving my self for any past mistakes that are holding me back. For some reason, I had the particular impression that on this day that I should make the effort to offer that part of me by stepping forward and visiting with characters and their CMs around the park. I'm not an active talker, but you might say even with the lack of words, I have my own version of a super power.
Ah, super powers! The thing everyone seems to dream about having, but in reality, don't we all have a sort of super power? With years of dealing with people, I know that my particular "super power" is that of being able to transmit some sort of positive influence on people without having to talk to them. I've seen the transition in their faces. So the conclusion to this was that I needed to stop sneaking around incognito in the crowds--in a way it wasn't working anyway--and let myself be seen. If the people I encounter are open to it, wonderful, if not, wonderful!
So the day began and as I wandered through Disneyland I discovered the Alice in Wonderland rides were finally opened after all the rain, so after catching one of the rides, I discovered the Mad Hatter and Alice were still available at the Tea Cups. Thus began my mission to introduce myself. Alice noticed our hair similarities and the Mad Hatter believed compared my shirt to the trouble making Cheshire Cat. There actually may be some truth to that. I'm pretty good at being sneaky when I get mischievous. They were very good to me. I rode the Tea Cups following that and continued on to Toontown, which must have just opened, because there was hardly anyone there yet. For this introvert, that was a wonderful surprise!
I was able to catch a photo with Pluto, Minnie Mouse, and Mickey while I was there within about a half an hour. The CM with Pluto liked my shirt, and I think Pluto was trying to play with my hair a little before we took the picture. Minnie Mouse for some reason must have thought I was super sweet, because she threw her arms around me and gave me a kiss on the cheek. For some reason I always end up having awkward photos with Mickey. I don't know why that is. The guy taking the picture thought maybe I was starstruck, because I didn't do a lot of interaction. I was a little confused at that, because the girl in front of me didn't do much either, and I wondered what I was doing differently. Anyway, I tried to explain I was just a quiet person and not great at chatting, but I did manage to thank Mickey before I left. Tinkerbell seemed the next appropriate stop before stopping by the royal hall for a visit with the princesses.
The princesses were so good to me last time, but I think I needed that so much at the time. This time the interaction was just mainly to get a picture, though I found Ariel to be particularly friendly. I mentioned before I left to Snow White that her stepmother disliked me-based on an earlier encounter on this same day.
Ah, speaking of The Queen herself. Yes, I came across her again on this day, and ended up in her pathway again as she was leaving a meet and greet area. The Queen was in her normal mood, prancing and shouting goodbyes to all the peasants along her way, and there was a small gap of no one in her way, so she went quietly along her way. As she came closer, I turned around so to not have my back turned toward her, and to watch her pass, but it became clear at that same moment that I was interrupting her solace, and that she became quite determined to not look at me or speak to me as she passed. Awkward as it might feel, I was still determined to remain composed as she walked past. I knew her wish to avoid me, so I let her pass without any additional complications. It was super quiet. When she finally passed me and made sure she passed me, she mumbled a sullen little goodbye in hardly even a whisper before she snapped back into her usual proud walk and cape swinging. My fate was sealed. I had been severely snubbed. Congratulations me. I am now an official honorary member of The Queen's Snubbed Club! I think I'm going to have to keep a close eye on the apples pies showing up at the house for the holiday season.
Princess Aurora was finishing up visiting people when I happened to grab the last spot just in time. By this time dropping in and visiting was getting much easier. Because I was at the end of the line, and they had to leave, the visit was brief, but to be honest, Aurora was one of my favorite childhood princesses, so it seemed like the thing to do for the little girl that I was who never got the chance to meet her.
I was taking a break at my hotel room for some quiet and to recharge my phone when it suddenly started raining. You'd think that by now I'd had enough of the rain, but when I saw it, it was almost like it was calling to me. I wanted so badly for my phone to recharge faster so that I could get out of the room and out into the rain. The second it notified me that it was ready and charged, I was out of there. I went around the hotel, and out into Downtown Disney. There were so many people trying to get out of there, so I was left wandering the area with so much space open. Ah, space, there's nothing so beautiful to an introvert as that! I was free to wander around aimlessly without people staring at me wondering if I'm lost. Watching the fountains getting covered in ripples from the raindrops and examining the plants all spotted with rain. The mere joy of wandering out there and feeling the cool wetness was enough! I'm a fan of rain, if you can't tell. It made everything extra shiny and beautiful when it got dark.
Being my last evening and the only opportunity available, I made sure I went to see Fantasmic! It was up close and personal, and again as the evening before, I delighted in the mist blowing into my face, and it got even better for fireworks, because I was able to stand closer.
There was a man there who asked me if he could have his children take my spot for the fireworks, and being an introvert my response was a little slow, so he was assuming I didn't want to let him, but after having time to process it and seeing they were still close by, I motioned them over. I could always see everything over their heads. It ended up half of them had to leave anyway for misbehaving.
After the fireworks, I kept to the sides of main street since there were hundreds, perhaps thousands of people exiting, and I knew from the past that in order to spare myself anxiety, I needed to wait for the crowd to decrease before I could make any moves. When it did reduce, I went up to the castle and found a beautiful open space right in front of it where I could once more admire its lighting.
This part of the story might sound a little weird to some people, and it is a bit personal, but for some reason I feel like I need to share it. It was at that point when I began to have those emotions emerging within, and I don't really know what brought them out again, but it became quite strong. I wandered down to the main street fire station, and for some reason decided to stop there to watch all of the people exiting the park. As I watched the stream of men, women, and children pass by me, the emotions grew on stronger. Every single one of those people before me were loved, and those I'd encountered throughout the day or the week, even if they didn't realize it. It became so overwhelming that I was to the point of crying. I had to leave the park and let it all out at the hotel.
So my day started with a cry, and it ended with a cry, but it was all good. I still have no clue why I thought meeting everyone was the thing to do, but hopefully at least a few of them finished that day with some benefit from our interaction, no matter the length of it.
